First-Week Retention Studio
A six-week taught programme on Onboarding Drop-Off Analysis. You work one product story from the invite through the first saved object, then write a map your colleagues can argue with.
Learning outcomes
- Split a blended activation rate into named exits with timestamps.
- Annotate five session recordings without collapsing them into a single persona.
- Draft a week-one email that names the job, not the feature list.
- Write a one-page limitation note that can sit in a GB board pack.
- Hand a two-line glossary to support so they stop translating growth jargon live.
Modules
1. The abandoned name
Pick one signup that never returned. Reconstruct time of day, device, and the last screen. No dashboards yet.
2. Event names that lie
Audit duplicate “signup” events, missing properties, and clocks that disagree between email and product.
3. Verify is not arrival
Map the minutes after email confirm: password managers, SSO stalls, and empty workspaces.
4. Quiet hour
Watch recordings without speaking for fifty minutes, then write only what you saw, not what you wished.
5. Empty states as exits
Treat the first blank canvas as a drop-off surface. Rewrite it with one job, one example, one next click.
6. Invite copy without cheerleading
Replace motivational filler with a sentence a tired new user can finish.
7. Support hears it first
Build the handoff note: what growth believes happened versus what the ticket actually says.
8. Time windows
Why a seven-day activation window hides Thursday-night walk-outs in weekly tiles.
9. What you will not claim
Write the limitation: sample size, seasonality, and the sales-assisted accounts you must exclude.
10. Critique week
Peer review of maps. You must defend one decision you reversed.
11. The short report
Three pages, no appendix theatre. One recommendation you can ship in a sprint.
12. Aftercare
Office hour on what broke after you changed the empty state. Optional, and often the most awkward hour.
Instructor
Priya Langford
Priya taught activation work inside two GB SaaS firms before opening the Birdwell studio. She still marks every quiet-hour note herself. She will not pretend a six-week course replaces a researcher on staff.
Informational fee
A Studio Seat is listed at £640 per person for the six weeks, including recorded lessons and two critiques. The Cohort Bench add-on (live marking) is listed on the fees page. This page cannot take payment; write to us if you want an invoice conversation.
Questions we actually get
Do I need an analyst on the team?
You need export access to events and permission to watch recordings. Spreadsheet comfort is enough. If your tracking plan is broken, start with Event Hygiene before this studio.
Can we use a consumer app as the case?
Yes, if you can legally share recordings. Marketplace and social products often stall on empty social graphs; we have materials for that pattern.
What is the real limitation of this course?
We cannot see unpaid traffic quality. If your ads send people who never intended to set up a workspace, your drop-off map will look like a product problem when it is an acquisition problem. We teach you to flag that, not to fix media buying.
Is there a certificate?
A completion note on studio letterhead, if you submit the short report. It is not an accredited qualification.
Notes from past seats
Module 4 felt almost rude. Fifty minutes of silence, then Priya asked what colour the error toast was. I had not noticed. That is now in our QA checklist.
★★★★☆
Clear teaching. The live critique queue ran long in March, so written feedback arrived a day late. The map itself still sits in our Notion.